It Ain’t Easy Being Indian – September 2019

photo of ricey wild

By Ricey Wild

Dear Teacher,
“What I did this summer.”
Well, actual summer temps came late to Rezberry and so the growing season was short. I was anxious for all the milkweed in my yard to grow and blossom so the Monarch butterflies could thrive like last year and the one before that. I go outside on my tiny ‘porch’ every chance I get and this year I’ve not seen many dragonflies (my spirit insect) so much or bees and even flies and spiders. I feel cheated somehow.
O! I haven’t seen one tick on me or my fur-babies. Ya, that’s a good thing, but? Even skeeters have been less bloodthirsty. I’m asking what is and why are those jets that are spraying on us and our environment? Yanno – the chem-trails? What’s going on here? Too many people are complacent with their current ease and ability to pay their bills. Sad, really.
But Teacher, I’ve been through a lot of B.S. recently and have had to resort to therapy to try and deal with it, yet again. No shame in my game though. Yo! I did not invite drama into my home at all. Gotta get me a sign for the front door. “I have zero – to give now G’wan!” Didn’t happen that way at all. I was left to pick up the pieces of my funny bone. I made a mosaic of the shattered remains of my former self.
Dear Teacher, I was mourning my beloved grandmother Rose who was my first fan and I was sitting here like this wondering “WTF” do I do now? My Gram was the reason I moved here to Rezberry and now she’s gone, at 100+years. I had friends who showed up for me and I will never forget that, even if we don’t talk anymore. Her absence has confused me.
Teacher, I’ve tried to keep it together and maintain and I am thankful, because I’m still lost. I went to a golf tournament with my BF Lorri. Her brother ‘Pink’ held a pig roast (I did not partake of the pig). I sat with Carol and Ed and their family. It was sweet. I had to hide my tears under cat-eye sunglasses, wishing my Fam was more like them.
Well, my family’s BBQs were always in the dark and we had to have a flashlight to make sure meat was done. We just laughed. Kinda makes me sad. So I didn’t have any BBQs here, but there was this time I already wrote about that time I got stuck in a canvas chair and whilst being evicted from it, I rolled toward the fire. LOL! I didn’t know at the time I was to be the Solstice Sista Sacrifice! Well, they better get me next time.
We all have to come in handy sometimes.
Teacher, I got another dog I named B-U-DUBBA-G. She’s little and thinks she’s badass cuz she comes from California. She’s met my cats, Rez Dawgs and various other critters. Bugg is what I call a Malti-Mutt and she ain’t been ate up yet, so I know Bugg has a future here. Ya, not gonna worry too much. Yet.
Teacher, there have been many days, some in rows, where I haven’t been able to get out of bed. I need you to know I recognize my symptoms and will do everything to help myself. I am currently in some weird therapy and have plans to get my fabulous legs back to strength. I have a ways to go but I’m heading there.
Dear Teacher, I was highly distracted by absurd situations, as if I was in a situational comedy but found no humor in it. Actually, I lie, there were huge actions that propelled me into another reality. I really liked it. It was, “Is this really happening?” “Are you going to hit me?” “No let’s go talk”. “Okay” sez I. *shrug*
Hey Teach, I got really brown this summer. One time a dragonfly was munching up a bug and me watching. It then flew up, landed on my left shoulder and continued it’s meal. I could hear it! That is my most memorable moment thus far into this year.
Well now, I don’t feel that all the summer excitement is over. I still have many evenings of semi-solitude on my micro-back porch. I crank up my favorite music and breathe. If you do and like the same peace I do then register to VOTE!
Ya, I went there. Voting in the next election is crucial – like if you wanna live or die. I kid you not. Do ya’ll like clean water? Think about it. Then decide what is more important? Your paper portfolio or your children’s health?
That’s it for now Teacher, Miigwech!