By Ricey Wild
Pay no attention to the woman behind the curtain. *ahem* I am a great and utter being!!!
I also boogited myself awake with a loud and thunderous ripple of a gaseous roar. I shuffled to the bathroom and upon inspecting my undergarment there was no residue, only air that escaped my nether region. All is well here and I take what I can get.
When I was a young, spry chick I could jump snowbanks in a single bound wearing spike heels (I live in Minnesnow-ta). “Those were the days my friends, I thought they would never end something something something”. A song from about the 70’s.
All I can think about right now is the upcoming presidential election. The candidates are spending crazy money to win. And heck, I would tattoo one word on my forehead that would say VOTE! Well, given the cash while I rifle through trash bins. Yup! That’s me out there all dressed up and nowhere to go except your neighbor’s garbage receptacle to continue digging for nutrients that my cats and dogs can eat. I shall keep a few chickens in my vintage Wal-Fart shopping cart for protein via eggs. A woman can dream yanno? *sweet interruption*
Purrince just knows when I’m tryna write and wants to sit on my lap. At least he purrs and provides fuzzy comfort. 99.9% of the people I know don’t do that. Not that I want them to sit on my lap but it would be a nice option. Purring is situational. Love your pets. They don’t judge you but I will.
Current issues: Mitzi Rose, the dog who was born in Rezberry, survived living in the Compound (that’s another story) and ended up here and saved my wicked life. Mitzi is my bonus round. She is why I HAVE to get out of bed to let her and her little sister Tha Bugg outside to do their business. Hmm…Seems like this column has an unconscious theme going on.
Before my Gramma Rose was actively dying she had prepared me for her passing. I understood as if we were not in front of the same bus she would leave before me. That did not happen but also did not make the loss of her any less. I still miss her physical presence but I feel her impact upon me every minute of every day. For me? That is what love is.
When I observe Mitzi Rose – who is deaf, mostly blind and may have cancer – I also see that she loves her treats, her dish that is never empty and the fewer scritches I can get in is satisfied and good for now. My dear readers plz know that I am not keeping Mitzi Rose around for selfish reasons. She is still here because she wants to be.
I know fur sure Mitzi will always be near me, kinda like she follows me to the Loo to make sure everything comes out right. My cats are on duty too – so my Life Alert necklace? My cats let them know.
I am still breathing thus far. Just bury me with my books and my Fuzz-Buttz remains. They are in little canisters, ashes, which I will soon be too. R U listening, Son? Passive/aggressive much?nI thank my birth mother for that and my friend who has since passed on (Mark Anthony Rolo) who told me that I am and I believe him. I learned from the beasts, plural.
“How I Came to Be”. LOL. I did not become the creature I am now without diabolic and angelic help. Ya hey! I am a Gemini yanno. I make me laugh. Time for editing now. Just in case you can’t tell, I’m in a goofy mood and don’t recall when I last took my meds. I’ll figure it out soon. The thing is I’m speaking, as such, from my soul. I am opening up to the real me.
Ya wanna hear more of this? Ima haffa write that book. Not saying I’m going off my meds, I need them to function somewhat normally. What I do mean is that I will not hide who and what I have become due to circumstances beyond my control. FFS I was just a little girl! Every day I cry inside asking, “Why did I come back here?!”
Apparently I still have lessons to be learnt. So I grudge my body out of my bed. Still half-asleep I barely make it to the toilet and being mystified by the dream I had…only to realize that in my dream I was looking to pee!!! LOL! It do sometimes be like that. \This column is dedicated to those who have encouraged me to write a book. Yooz are forewarned.
